We Aren't White

A few weeks ago, I had an interesting conversation with my 8 year old.  She was talking about the ethnic make up of the children in her class, and how many different ethnicities there were.  I felt grateful that I was raising my girls in a very diverse community.  The conversation was upbeat until she said, "Everyone is interesting, but we are just white."

I quickly corrected her, "We aren't white, we are Jewish."  She was confused, and held up her arm, "No, Mom, we are white."  By this time, my older daughter was chiming in siding with her sister about the fact that we are Caucasian.  From this point on, I had the very touchy task of explaining that, although we appear Caucasian, we are not accepted as Caucasian, simply because we are Jewish.

I completely understand their confusion.  Both of my daughters have sandy blonde hair, my older daughter has crystal blue eyes, and they have their dad's fair skin.  Their hair is thick and wavy, but not overly curly.  They don't look "traditionally Jewish".  If they didn't tell you they were Jewish or wear Star of David necklaces, you would never know that they were.

Herein lies the Catch 22 for most "passable" American Jews.  We look like any other Caucasian person.  While this has allowed us to assimilate comfortably, it has also made many Jews very complacent.  They have become so complacent that they forget, and sometimes, ignore blatant anti-Semitism.

Anti-Semitism is very much alive and thriving.  Hate crimes against Jewish people in the United States are at the highest levels they have been in decades, liberal groups that proclaim to champion inclusivity are hypocritically steadfast in their resolve to include everyone except Jews, and conservative groups still view us with an air of suspicion, if not, blatant open discrimination.  American anti-Semitism usually takes the form of anti-Israel bias, but, when allowed, can go from "Israel Should Not Exist" to "Jews to the Ovens" in 10 hot seconds.  We saw this a couple of years ago during the conflict with Gaza.

Last year, we saw American Nazis marching with torches yelling "Jews Will Not Replace Us".  I think this was a harsh wakeup call to many "passable" American Jews.  This hateful mob targeted two groups of people: African Americans and Jews, reminding us, once again, that we are not white.  We do not get the same privileges as actual Caucasians.  This is what I had to explain to my girls without scaring them, but had to explain it well enough to make them aware of the challenges they will soon face.

In four years, my older daughter will go to college.  Most college campuses, particularly in California, are not friendly places to Jews.  College students relish the fantasy of standing up for the underdog, and their naivety is often manipulated and misused by those with a political agenda, particularly an anti-Semitic one.  My daughters will have to face this.  They will have to face comments about the holidays they celebrate, the food that they eat, their support of Israel, and baseless assumptions that people will assign to them, simply because they are Jewish.

White people don't have to deal with all of this, but my Jewish girls will.  White people don't have to explain that they don't "hate" Jesus or that they aren't the natural enemies of Muslims.  White people don't have to go out of their way to comfort people who wish them a "Merry Christmas" then feel bad when they realize you're Jewish (seriously, we don't care, and we are just happy you said something nice to us).  White people don't have to constantly justify their support of their people's homeland, and have to look at how much they are despised in the Comments section of every news site that features a story about Israel or Jewish people.  White people don't have to deal with apathetic people in their own community who could care less about having an identity, and would rather assimilate at any cost.

I'm raising my daughters to be proud, to be Jewish, to be supporters of Israel, and will always tell them the hard truths, including letting them know that we aren't white.