I'm Baaaacck!

I may be back, but I'm still a touch braindead after working myself into the ground for the past three weeks. Here's a quick 411:

• The event was phenominal! Way more work in the past two weeks than anticipated, because I had 50 people RSVP the week of, which advances my theory that folks in the Seattle area are completely socially retarded. When you get an invitation six weeks before the event, and you RSVP (with attitude at that) 72 hours before the event, you are socially retarded.
• I met my financial goal....well, maybe. The big thrill of the evening, aside from the auction itself, is to tally up the amount raised at the end of the night and have my boss announce it in front of the crowd. This didn't happen last night, because the cashiering service didn't punch things in right, so I left my event not knowing how much money the event raised. Basically, if you do charity events for a living, not getting that total at the end of the night is the equivalent to not hitting the "Big O" after having sex for a half hour. It's so disappointing.
• Due to not knowing how much money was actually raised means that tomorrow, I have to audit the entire auction, and I'm still braindead. Trying to do math, while being braindead is somewhat painful.
• I sent Jeff and Rachael to Southern California last Tuesday, so that I could focus my full energy on my event. Now that the event is over, I'm sad that they won't be back until Wednesday. Fozzy is a loyal and happy companion, but he's not much of a conversationalist.

Other weird stuff that happened while I was out:

• My boss found out that he has very aggressive liver cancer, which is going to make me feel like a major asshole when I tell them I'm quitting in a few weeks. If you have any suggestions on how I can do this tactfully, please speak up. Aside from telling them that I'm secretly a revolutionary activist working against the American government, and I have to move to Sweden, because they don't have an extradition treaty with the U.S., I'm at a loss for a good excuse that won't make me look like a total jerk.
• My step-stepmom decided to get the marriage annulled between herself and my stepdad, because my stepdad was too restless at night to sleep in the same bed with her. My stepdad has survived a double-lung transplant and a kidney transplant, and the only way you can continue to live is to take some very serious anti-rejection medication. His medication gives him side effects that don't allow him to sleep more than a few hours at a time, and often he can't sleep lying down flat. Apparently she took this as an afront, and ended up telling him that his night twitches didn't fit into her very definition of marriage, so she gave him papers and he signed them. I feel bad for my stepdad, my brother, all of my family, and their friends. The only thing I know for sure is that somewhere my mom is chuckling, because she was always sort of a morbid, jealous person. I loved her, but it's the truth.
• We were nearly sued by some crazy bitch who bought a shelving unit from us. We posted on Craigslist, like we have a dozen times before, and she came to our house to pick it up. Jeff told her to bring a truck, but she didn't listen. He took the whole thing apart (which took him 1 1/2 hours), and loaded half of it into her SUV. She changed her mind two weeks later, but all sales were final. We left the rest of it out on the porch for her to pick up while we were at work. The next day we received a letter in the mail from her claiming that she twisted her ankle on our steps and she wanted our insurance company info. We didn't respond, and haven't heard from her since. She turned around and re-sold the shelving unit on Craigslist for $50 more than she paid us.

I guess that's it for now. I'll address current events in a couple of days, when I'm no longer braindead, and I can give proper lip service to the corporate media for focusing more attention on the trial of Anna Nicole's corpse than Scooter Libby's treason, Brittney Spears' breakdown which should be a warning to all moms not to sell their daughters into sexual objectification at the age of 16, Democrats vs. Republicans which is meaningless, because they are all owned by the same corporations, and the most disturbing current event of them all: how a nice Jewish punk rock chick from the Seattle 'burbs came to agree with Louis Farrakhan.