Every now and again the citizenry of my country tend to go way off kilter and it takes someone unafraid and outspoken to give them a verbal bitchslap back into reality. As a way of contributing to the greater good of society, I will now be the giver of that bitchslap with an overdue reality check.
I’m grateful to the television gods for creating home improvement shows. They gave average Americans the ability to look at their dwelling in a new light, ditch the fugly ass wallpaper, and dream of daring colors for the living room, not to mention single-handedly reviving the slipcover industry. However, just because you have watched all of the seasons of Trading Spaces, doesn’t mean you have a degree from a design school or years of interior decorating under your belt.
When I’m at Target and happen to hear one woman harshly schooling another about the types of fabric clashing with the color of wood in her bedroom, and I look over to see the know-it-all wearing hospital scrubs, indicating that she is absolutely not making her living designing home spaces, I have to say something.
This phenomenon of average Americans thinking they are experts just because they have gained a little knowledge from television is really pissing me off. Construction workers and hairstylists after hours of Food Network viewing think they have the right to rake a poor waiter over the coals about how their ahi tuna steak is prepared, all the while quoting Rachael Ray incorrectly.
I’m glad people are learning new things, and I’m all in favor of one expanding their horizons, but just because you watched the last two What Not To Wear marathons doesn’t erase the fact that two years ago your closet was filled with holiday sweatshirts and stretch pants (excuse me, I mean leggings).
These shows are nothing new in terms of educating the public as to new social norms, fashion, and public behavior. Back in the early 1900s at the height of American immigration large, city newspapers often published sections about fashion, proper language, how to set up an “American” home, and a number of so-called helpful tips to encourage new citizens to abandon their old country ways and become proper Americans.
In a way, these shows do the same thing. On one hand, they give you great advice for refreshing your room on a budget with a bunch of do-it-yourself tricks, but what if just rearranging the furniture would do the same thing? Best of all, you wouldn’t have to consume! Maybe some of the things in your closet are a bit outdated, but as long as you have some basics, then there is no need to do a major clearing, send everything to Goodwill, and start over spending hundreds of dollars on clothing that will just end up in the show's Goodwill pile next season. Perhaps a new hairstyle and different shade of lipstick is all you really need.
The other thing that irks me about these shows is that they make people into artificial experts. Just because you drink wine a few times a week, doesn’t mean you are a sommelier, it means you might have a slight drinking problem. I have a friend who has been programming computer code for at least 15+ years. He is an expert on programming, and if I had a programming question then I’d probably wonder why my life had become so boring, then I’d ask him, because he’s an expert. However, I wouldn’t ask him about child rearing, because he isn’t a parent, and just because he’s seen a few shows about kids on TLC doesn’t mean he is in any sort of position to give advice.
Most of those designers, chefs, interior decorators, and other so-called experts are people whose work the majority of us find a bit hideous. If I answered my door tomorrow, and Doug from Trading Spaces was standing there, I’d sick my fat, lazy cockerdoodle on him and look for a sharp knife while hiding my throw pillows. My bedroom may be far from perfect, but the shit he does is unforgivably bad. Sure there are times when I wouldn’t mind Trini and Susannah’s input in the dressing room, or Emeril’s beef rib rub recipe, but I’m happy doing what I do and knowing what I know. Just because I made Martha Stewart’s Six Layer Chocolate Truffle Cake doesn’t make me a pastry chef, but it was might tasty.
3 comments:
Little Caz could live with our bathroom. I couldn't. The quotes were huge! I saw a TV programme and decided to do it myself. It's been a building site for 3 years. I hate programmes like this 'cause I'm dumb enough to try it!
The UK was shown nothing but makeover programmes for the past 15 years. Finally it has stopped. The shows end up being more about the designer rather than the needs/wants of the home owner.
Then again, if you are so unimaginative yourself and 'need' to have a designer with a tv crew in tow then frankly its beyond help.
I hear you 4D. I thought I could re-do hubby's office one day while he was at work, because I had been watching way too much Trading Spaces. Three days later, with his help, we finally finished it.
Post a Comment