Frankenstein Nation

When I was growing up we spoke in hushed tones about my Grammy’s facelift. Upon completion of every whispered conversation my mother and I had about it, she would always end with the threat that I would be skinned within an inch of my life if I ever said anything about it in front of Grammy. My, oh my, how the world has changed.

Perhaps I’m sounding like an old fart, but I remember the day when celebrities were ashamed about their plastic surgeries and went to great lengths to hide public knowledge of their procedures. There used to be an air of mystery to the ol’ nip/tuck, and regular, average joe type of folks never thought twice about having anything done, because it was too expensive or it was the type of thing that was only done in Hollywood or New York City. The crazy thing is that these days I speak of were less than 20 years ago!

If someone would have cornered me in the hallways of junior high and told me that instead of Miami Vice, people in 20 years would be watching real women having nose jobs, facelifts, and tummy tucks on television, I would have been stunned out of my big hair and acid-washed jeans. What I’m left trying to figure out at this point is how we, as a society, in less than 20 years became so obsessed with our appearance that we are willing to undergo Spanish Inquisition-style tortures just to achieve an ideal.

First off, I don’t want to generalize. There is a world of difference between a 50-something woman who has a facelift, because she was ill informed about the dangers of sunbathing as a teenager and was left with a prematurely aged face as opposed to a 20-something woman who is working an entry-level job, and maxes out her credit cards to pay for an eyelash transplant (oh yes, this is an actual procedure).

I’ve heard arguments for and against the plastic surgery craze. Of course, the against looks at the issue as an inherently sexist one arguing that women have had an unrealistic image of beauty pounded into their heads for so long that body modification is merely the next step in the evolution of trying to live up to that poisoning image. This makes sense, and I do believe there is something to it, but the side that is for plastic surgery has their own weigh in. They reason that women finally have a way to fix what they don’t like about themselves, and the fact that they are doing it means that they have become financially viable enough to create an industry dedicated to them. While I’m happy that women have enough money and power to influence a segment of the economy; I just wish it wasn’t in a field that catered to making them pretty.

I also get a bit skeptical at an industry that claims to be driven by female consumers, yet allows some women to have multiple surgeries to the point where a doctor’s loyalty to the Hippocratic Oath comes into question. Also, I would argue that some of the procedures don’t seem very female driven such as the surgery that allows women to reconstruct their vaginas, so it will have a tighter teenage look, or the whole inflate-boob thing.

I must confess that I have personally taken an interest in possibly having a breast lift after I’m finished having children, because none of those wonderful, mommy-to-be instruction books ever warned me about the devastating effects childbearing would have on my tits! However, if I do opt to fix my boobs, they will remain the same size. I have seen those inflate-boob women, and they just look silly (that’s right Pamela Anderson Lee Rock Whatever; your boobs will embarrass your kids in about 10 years). How could a teenager ever feel cool about having their parents chaperone a dance when mom looks like she’s ready to strip at The Lusty Lady on “Over 40, but Still Fabulous” night.

If a woman with the means to do it wants to have a little something done here or there, more power to her, but I fear that the vast majority of women going under the knife are doing it, because they feel inadequate. They believe that what they have isn’t acceptable to the greater society, and that by doing a surgery, their whole life will be transformed. This sets them up with an unrealistic expectation, which for some leads to multiple surgeries, an assload of debt, and a person who still feels bad about who she is.

I’m not sure exactly what has changed from 20 years ago, but somewhere along the line as women were gaining higher professional positions, more wealth, better opportunities for advancement, and a collective voice, that annoying group of jocks who told them they weren’t pretty in high school reared their ugly heads via negative societal influence and made successful women feel bad about not being prom queen. The result has been a thriving plastic surgery industry where a nip and tuck might make you look younger, but will never make you feel better.