I can’t believe I’ve spent so much time in life being grateful for my family, friends, and a decent home, when I should have focused all of my energies and praise on Paris Hilton.
Perhaps I’ve had my head in the sand, and overlooked the tremendous gift that Paris brings to my life. You see, my life is mundane, and Paris brings “beauty and excitement” to it, or so she claims on her MySpace site. I’m not alone in the drudgery of daily life, apparently everyone else has a boring, average, and simple life that is uplifted just by knowing that Paris exists on the same planet as we do. I am particularly envious of those regular folks who reside in California, because they get to live in the same state as Paris, whereas I have to live a few hundred miles further away.
Paris’ gift of presence to the world doesn’t just end with the glamour she brings to all our mundane lives; she further enhances our being by providing “hope to young people all over the U.S. and the world”. You hear that kids! Be grateful that Paris is willing to lend her valuable time to be your role model. She may not serve on the Board of a charitable foundation or volunteer for worthwhile causes or spend her time receiving a valuable education that would enable her to give something positive back to society, but she was the chick that made the phrase, “That’s Hot” popular.
Our socialite goddess is in the throws of a very nasty legal battle whereby the County of Los Angeles wants to punish her for violating her probation. The probation may have stemmed from a drunk driving arrest, but her subsequent violations had nothing to do with alcohol. All Paris wanted to do was drive her Bentley. Is that so wrong? The people who read her mail told her it would be okay, so that means that this whole thing wasn’t her fault. She might have been driving late at night with the headlights off, but that’s a mistake anyone can make, besides L.A. has plenty of streetlights and the neon signs from the clubs are illumination enough. It’s not like she hit someone crossing the street or killed anyone in the process of driving recklessly, that would have required an entire high-powered legal team, and she has only needed the assistance of two influential attorneys.
The thought of Paris in jail for 45 days should be a national tragedy. Yesterday she released a nicely scripted statement that said she wasn’t above the law, was sorry for her probation violations, and just wanted to be treated fairly. All Paris ever wanted was to be treated like a regular person when she entered clubs with VIP access, took private jets for travel, was whisked away to private dining rooms at restaurants, had her bodyguards clear the bathroom at Starbucks so she could use it, you know, just like the rest of us. Paris is a woman of the people, and by people, I mean anyone who has a net worth of over $10 million. The rest of us are relegated to fawning over her via the internet, magazine and newspaper profiles, watching her TV show, and listening to her brilliant CD.
My point is that all of us with mundane lives should be grateful for what Paris brings to us, and should rise up in anger that Los Angeles County would lock such a humanitarian away for 45-days whether the reasoning is legitimate or not. Forget the increasing poverty, the unjust and illegal war, the widening of the gaps between rich and poor, our suffering environment, the inadequate education system, or the off-shoring of American jobs, this country should be focused on righting this wrong against Paris.
Thankfully a decent human being named Jonathan has started an online petition addressed to Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger asking him to pardon Paris, but I prefer the other petition at www.ipetitions.com/petition/45daysforParis/.
When someone, such as Paris, is so out of whack that she thinks this much of herself, a mere 45-day jail sentence might be the big reality check she needs. What I’m wondering now is would it be possible for the media to serve the 45 days along with Paris, because their priorities and sense of what is important seem to be just as screwed up as hers.
3 comments:
It absolutely baffles me how she thinks of herself as some sort of do-gooder. Bringing hope to the people? The only hope she brings to me is that she'll get her just desserts and it's stop her from being such a fucking cunt.
I really hate that I even care about the whole thing, but the idea that this scourge of humanity- this absolutely worthless human being- thinks she deserves to be treated differently is so irksome.
I hear you, Rose. On one hand, I hate the fact that I have to address such a worthless human being. On the other hand, it gives me a great opportunity to point out what needs to be corrected.
The thing that I've noticed about this whole situation is that the media is mainly what is making Paris popular. I don't see too many average people (even young teenage girls) who think that much of her.
American socialites used to be known for style, class, and their charitable works. They were looked up to, and envied. However, most women I've talked to, even very young girls, just seem disgusted by Paris. She may have put herself on a high horse, but no one else is.
I don't give a toss about Paris Hilton. She hasn't even got nice boobs. oops. man thing....couldn't they make it 45 years?
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